Joy comes with the Morning

What is this elusive thing called faith?

If I have seen the sun rise above the mountains over and over again, and I believe that the sun will continue to rise above the mountains every single day - is that faith?

If I have never seen the sun rise above the mountains, but I am told and I firmly believe that the sun will, eventually, rise above the mountains - is that faith?

If I have lived in a world of darkness my whole life, never knowing any better, and am told about light and colours and all beautiful things seen, and then despairingly, achingly, anxiously wait for the sun to rise above the mountains because I need it, I want it to rise - is that faith?

When will the day break?

And yet, I know all things happen for a reason with the God who loves us more than we can imagine or know or dream.

Why you so liddat

why lah.

So, I spend 40 minutes trying to track down a book by a man, name of Goh Cheng Tek? Sounds familiar, I muse, but then turn my thoughts to more pragmatic Southeast Asian history-based endeavours.

I type May 13 into Yale's Orbis. But the only books that come up are TARahman's and RARazak's. No offence, but not exactly what I'm looking for.

Hm. How to search? "May thirteenth" doesn't bring up anything. Neither does "May thirteen". What about "May" "Thirteen"? Or "May" "Thirteenth"? Let's try, instead, "May" "13"?

Hmmmmm. Lessee. Calls for drastic measures. Let's google this guy's name, and see what the exact title of the book is.

I. Cannot. Find. His Name. In Google. In Wikipedia. In Yale's Orbis database. I start to panic.. WTF??? HOW COME GOOGLE DOESN'T HAVE! My trust in the corporate free-education monoliths of Google and Wikipedia , and the corporate 50,000USD/year Yale conglomerate quickly starts unravelling. I frenziedly type in any combination of Roman alphabets that comes close to sounding like "Goh" "Cheng" and "Tek".

Orbis says: Input: Author (lastname/firstname). I type Cheng, Goh Tek. Goh, Cheng Tek. Tek, Goh Cheng?? I type Chieng, Goh Tek. Tek, Goh Chieng? Teik? Goh? Chieng? Goh? Chieng? Cheng?

WHYWHYWHYWHYWHY. I am speechless, as Google and Orbis are speechless. KENAPAKENAPAKENAPA. Okay, okay. Breathe, Joyce, chill. Your world is still intact, trust me. I take a breath. I type "May Thirteenth and Democracy" into Google. This CAN'T FAIL, RIGHT. I get A HIT! JSTOR pats me on the back, smilingly, and hands me the full title of the book: The May Thirteenth Incident and Democracy In Malaysia. Eh, how was I supposed to know-lah, that you could fit democracy and Malaysia in the same sentence.

"Goh, Cheng Teik", Google Scholar coolly informs me, is the name of the author I am looking for.

I breathe a sigh of relief and type, confidently, into Orbis: "Goh, Cheng Teik."

Your search has resulted in 0 hits.

WHYYYYYYYYYYY

Then I get a flash of realisation! Joycey, you silly girl. I type the full name of the book into Orbis, sit back, compose a smile, and push the search button.

One Hit comes up, and Orbis instantly refreshes the page to pull up the book I am looking for.

The May Thirteenth Incident and Democracy In Malaysia, Orbis's cool, electronic voice informs me, is a book written by a man called "Goh, Charles T."

CHARLES? CHARLES T?

someone start a wiki for mr charles t. goh cheng teik, can? i think someone generations down the line will be most grateful.

Aiyo

... Don't you ever get those moments when you're wasting your time doing something fairly inappropriate (like taking shots of kahlua, or stalking friendster profiles, or translating whole passages of random Japanese webpages on babelfish, or reading ancient archives of friends' blogs..) and then you're like, wait. Why am I doing this?

I'm so ridiculous. Why am I wasting my time?

Spoken For

Take this world from me
I don't need it anymore
I am finally free
My heart is spoken for

Oh and I praise you
Oh and I worship you...

Covered by your love divine
Child of the risen Lord
To hear you say "This one's mine"
My heart is spoken for

Now I have a peace
I've never known before
I find myself complete
My heart is spoken for

Oh and I praise you
Oh and I worship you...

Covered by your love divine
Child of the risen Lord
To hear you say "This one's mine"
My heart is spoken for

By the power of the cross
You've taken what was lost
And made it fully yours
And I have been redeemed
By you that spoke to me
Now I am spoken for

Covered by your love divine
Child of the risen Lord
To hear you say "This one's mine"
My heart is spoken for

Take this world from me
Don't need it anymore...


Inextricable, but for His grace. Incomprehensible, but for His knowledge. Inconsequential, but for His love. Impossible, but for His power.

I am praying for everything to be okay.

Disney has given me unrealistic expectations about love!

So trueee.

But so ridiculously nostalgic..

help! i have opportunities!

aaauuggghhhh. get me out of the ivy friggin leagueeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.

Batu Talam and beyond

Ng Chee Pang, good luck to you. You have everything against you.

You are greatly admired for taking on the status quo.

Do I even need to say how this by-election is a perfect analogy of the current state of Malaysian politics in general?